• “I’ll bet having kids really helps your comedy!”

    Posted by on April 19, 2019

    “I’ll bet having kids…SLAP”

    That’s my visceral reaction to that question.  It’s funny, I was going to blog about this Monday.  This is the first time I could sit down in front of my computer and if the dog or cat wake my kids up, I’m going to sell them to a restaurant in a bad part of town.

    The basic answer to the question is yes, but there’s an issue or two, in case any comics reading this are wondering.  Yes, you get opportunities to collect more material.  My three year old daughter said to me the other day she was going to remove my “pay nay” for some reason and laughed.  That’s funny.  That’s not really a joke.  I had an old co-worker when I first started that did that.  Every time something remotely funny happened – “You gonna add that to your act?”  Yes, Carl, I’m going to add that joke about a misshipment of foam trays into my closing bit.”  Having something humorous happen doesn’t always translate into a bit.

    Also, there a little something called time.  Here’s how my day went the other day.  My son woke up at some ungodly hour, my wife had him, but was she was dog sick and I took him.  He went to sleep finally so I slept on the floor next to his crib because he was tossing and turning.  Then I woke up, did some things to get their dishes washed, and worked all day.  Came home, ran the vacuum, got dinner ready, did bath time and got them ready for bed.  My daughter fell asleep reading with me and then awoke suddenly and vomited on me.  Cleaned that up with my wife’s help, showered and got a few more things done.  Went to sleep at about 12: 04 am, last I looked.  Son woke up at 2:58 am, went back to sleep before four am.  Repeat cycle.  OH BOY LOOK AT THE MATERIAL I GOT.  NOW I’LL USE THESE 47 SECONDS OF FREE TIME TO REALLY WRITE AND HONE THIS BIT.

    I did a show once with two other comics.  One was a single guy, the other had three kids.  Single guy: “I want to travel for shows more, but I feel I really don’t have that much free time.”  Three kid guy: “I’m about to slap the shit out of you.”  That pretty much sums it up.

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