We signed up our daughter for a sports class. She is learning basic fundamentals, listening to a coach and most importantly, burning off any and all extra energy so Mom and Dad can sleep. There’s a younger class just before ours and after watching it, the coach should get a medal. It’s 2-3 year olds running around like they’re on fire, but enjoying it. He has to corral them and attempt to teach them to kick and jump. I’d rather train a cobra to be leash trained.
One kid stood out as we waited for the class to end. He was sprinting around screaming, “DON’T EAT MY FOOTBALL!” His dad was half-assed following him around while his mom kept yelling, “Scott! Scott! Scott! Scott!” and pointing at the kid. The dad had this look on his face like he was one more “Scott!” away from going to the store for smokes and never coming back. Finally, Scott had to chase down the other kid they had and his son that was really worried about his football becoming a snack ran up and ripped the last ball from another small kid, who began scream crying, “HE TOOK MY BALL!!!” The mugging was swift and violent and the mugged kid’s mom came over to console him. Scott’s wife started up with another round of Scott! Scott! but he was taking the other kid to the potty.
What happened next was like out of a movie. She stood up, looking left and right as if for a sign, then shuffled over to her son and weakly muttered something about taking a ball. Her kid looked at her and took off. She then meekly approached the victim of the highwayman son she made and whispered, “Sorry.” Then she went and sat down. It was like the polar opposite of the hillbilly lady at Wal-Mart that is smacking her kool-aid stained heathens. It didn’t work, in case you were wondering. The meltdown wasn’t appeased by the sentiment.
Make my kid apologize? Nah, that will just agitate the beast. Take the ball away to show him it’s not rewarding to take a toy like Hitler annexed Czechoslovakia in 1938? Nope, Neville Chamberlain mom has got this! Appease and hope it goes away. If you are reading about a monster teen knocking off liquor stores in 14 years, I think I know who it is. Now excuse me as I research how much whiskey you can give a 20 month old, my son has woke up at 1:30-3 am for five straight nights.