College and the “real world”

Sometimes memories won’t go away.  Every time I hear someone say the phrase “Welcome to the Real World” I don’t think of the MTV show, but a moment in college.  I was in a rather boring class with a very nice and eager professor.  She said to the students, “You know, people say college prepares you for the real world, but I think this is the real world!  College is tough!”  I don’t know what made me think about this moment nearly 19 years later, but let’s compare.

Hardest test?  College (C): Had strep throat on 21st birthday and a economics final.  Still went to a bar called the Cheyenne and had two beers.  Real World (RW): Had to help build a new room on second floor where none existed before with a pregnant wife.  Real World wins.

Stressful moment?  C: Frat bro smoking weed set off fire alarms when I was president.  Had student life and police searching house room by room with probation for entire chapter on line.  RW: Two children crying at same time for 45 minutes, no wife at home.  If near train tracks, would have jumped on and seen what happened next.  Real World wins by a hair, mostly because I figured out to shut down fire alarm for next time.  Haven’t figured out kids yet.

Lowest moment?  C: Someone stole full 30 pack of Busch Light out of fridge and it was too late to get beer.  RW: Lost job with pregnant wife.  RW wins.  (I know you’re surprised I picked this too.)

Toughest leadership trial?  C: Getting 50 reprobates to attend community service for violating keg ban.  RW: Getting toddler to eat…or get in tub…or put on PJ’s…or go to sleep.  RW wins by a landslide.  I would take yelling at 50 drunk 20 year olds all day over getting a toddler to put on a diaper.

Test of patience?  C: Guy played “Bombs over Baghdad” at full volume next to my room five times in a row.  I broke the CD in half.  RW: Sales manager had me redo call project that was approved and started three times; then abandoned call project.  RW wins – you can’t break a sales manager in half without going to jail.

In summation, my professor was full of hot garbage and completely wrong.  If anyone tells you college is like the “Real World” then ask them if in the Real World you can day drink on a Tuesday, if your “busy” day involves going to three classes for four hours, or if you decide to no call, no show, then someone can give you notes from the office and you’re cool.