CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD (or Field 3 Hilliard League)

I have played softball 11 straight years, one year I did two leagues.  I guess it’s the hillbilly gene.  Hillbillies LOVE softball almost as much as dip, sleeveless shirts and decals of Calvin peeing on another vehicle’s manufacturer symbol.  After many runner-up seasons, we finally won it all.  That’s right, you’re not only reading the blog of an unknown comedian, you’re also now reading the blog of the ninth or tenth best player on the Field 3 Hilliard City League champions.  You may want to change your underwear.

I used to pitch.  I had no really good pitches other than a one inch breaking curve when the wind was blowing, but I did get creative.  I would do an old timey wind up, move around the mound and about once a game, I threw the honeydipper.  This is where I rubbed the softball on my grundle and toss it from the nether zone.  It never worked.  We got a real pitcher, so I usually played on the right side of the field and prayed no one hit it to me.

Enough about my taint.  We pulled out the miracles and won 13-9.  Afterwards, we all agreed the trophy shouldn’t go to the bar because someone might steal or break it.  Then we all realized there was no chance in hell anyone’s wife would let them put a big ass ugly trophy on the mantle.  It’s by the pool table at the bar.  I decided to retire and take up something more my speed.  Are there any Magic the Gathering leagues sponsored by bars?  I don’t think you can pull a groin doing that.

One Reply to “CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD (or Field 3 Hilliard League)”

Comments are closed.