Here’s a rundown of traveling with a baby vs. myself, as I just experienced.
Me: I will be gone four days. 2 pairs of jeans, 4 T-shirts, toiletries, socks, undies, and…I guess I should grab a laptop and phone charger.
Me and wife with baby: We will be gone four days. We need five onesies, make it eight, half with long sleeves. Pants for all, have to match in case of pictures, which happen every seven seconds with a baby. Eight PJ’s. We need a thin blanket, a fleece blanket, and a soft blanket. Double those in case of poo or spitup. Check the weather – will it rain, snow, monsoon, earthquake or volcano? Better pack for that. Grab sound machine, timers, backup batteries, pack and play, portable swing, and floor mat. Need breastmilk – which must stay cold, probiotics, gas drops, vitamin D, calming tablets, bottles, tall bottles, short bottles, nipples, bottle caps, bag to steam clean bottles, drying mat, teething rings and toys. Toys must include ones to chew on, soft ones, fun ones, bright ones and whatever in the hell may help during a baby emergency. Get books with colors, pictures and ones that could calm baby down. Check weather again. Also need binkies (three kinds), diapers, butt cream, skin cream, lotion, baby soap, portable tub, washrags, towels, car seat, car seat holder, mirror with lights for backseat to entertain baby for trip. Load car again. Realize there is no room for baby. Repack. Baby socks, baby shoes, bottled water and formula for backup in case breastmilk vampire attacks. On second thought, let’s buy a hitch and drag the nursery behind us. Fill up gas beforehand so you don’t have to stop. Get on road, realize you forgot wife and baby, go back. Get to destination, make list so you don’t leave everything there. Vow to get back home and sell car so you don’t have to travel ever again. Happy Thanksgiving.