Holy crap, I still had a MySpace account

When I first started comedy, all I heard from other comics is that I had to be on MySpace.  I didn’t even have the internet at home, so I was unprepared for my first foray into social media.  I soon learned about fake friend requests (wow, this girl sure is wearing a slutty outfit…who is she friends with?  77 teenage boys.  Delete request.)  I also was exposed to the MySpace page themes that constantly crashed.  HOW WILL EVERYONE KNOW HOW MUCH I LIKE BUD LIGHT?  DAMMIT PAGE THEME!

MySpace was pretty good at first, but the whole “top friends” thing was the worst.  I used to get messages from people asking why I didn’t have them in the top whatever.  I ended up changing my top to about 40 people just to get everyone to shut the hell up.  I think putting together my bottom friends would be easier.  17 game requests?  You’re the worst – congrats!

Everyone I knew took part in a mass exodus in 2008ish and I soon forgot about MySpace.  My pal Dan pointed out I still had a link to it, which was humorous to me…until I went to my old page.  Holy shit, I had about 40 minutes of comedy online and it was awful.  I watched some old sets.  I made it through five and deleted the entire account before one more person had to watch me curse every 2.3 words and chug six beers in a 17 minute set.  For anyone that came to see me in 2007, you should get a purple heart or you are a sick, sick human being and you need a lot of help.  When I overcome the shame of watching myself, maybe I’ll blog about it.

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