I saw two things this week. One was at a family pool. It was a man, strutting around in front of children. No, not what you’re thinking – speedos are bad, but he was wearing full women’s bikini bottoms. They even had the tie on the side. That’s not strange at all – oh wait, this isn’t Key West, it’s a public pool. Kids are everywhere! Seriously, save the drag show for Saturday night weirdo. Now excuse me while I take a swig from my hidden flask and snarl at kids.
Then I got home. There is a teen, let’s just say, a little strange. He’s been wearing the same outfit for two days and is running around the parking lot with a full walkie talkie headset on having a full conversation (or not, maybe just himself). I said hello and he looked horrified and slid between two cars. OK, that actually is normal. Then I opened the door and he ducked past me into my condo’s common hallway. How long has this kid been out there? I don’t know whether to call the authorities or leave a sandwich in the hall. No, you’re right. If I feed him, he’ll come back. Don’t disturb the nest. However, turn in momma bird for keeping her young’uns in the parking lot for hours.