First off, quit reading blogs and go spend time with your family, you asshole! Except this one. Read it seventeen times from seventeen different computers and maybe I will get a damn sponsor. My Thanksgiving is usually spent in a way too hot house, eating stuff I like and fake eating stuff I am sick of (once I told Grandma no one made dressing, so she made 112 lbs. of it each year and I got stuck with the whole tub). Well, today I am at the casino for a host of reasons, but most importantly I’ll be having steak, booze and gambling. This is truly a blessed day.
It is a time of reflection, this day, but like most of you, I will fall asleep watching a shitty football game involving the Cowboys or Lions before that happens. One should take the time to tell those people in your life how thankful you are…or get drunk and tell them to go to hell, I’m no moral compass. Read these blogs, I’m a dirtbag. Happy Thanksgiving, and please remember the most important rule of the holiday – we will all have three shelves worth of leftovers. Keep your crappy hard cookies and leftover turkey at home – no one you work with wants it. Well, maybe that lonely guy with the weird skin condition. He’ll take it.