I went to check out a movie with my chica recently and realized movies are absolute dogshit right now. Let’s review!
If you don’t have kids, there goes Happy Feet Too, Arthur Christmas, Puss in Boots and the Muppets. Also, please stop telling me about all these stupid kids movies that “have a lot of adult jokes!” Not buying it, stop selling the fact you have to sit through this inane crap and justify to yourself.
If you think Jack and Jill is funny, please never, ever come to one of my shows. Or speak to me in public.
J. Edgar might be OK, but it seems long. That annoys me a little, but I’ll give Clint Eastwood the benefit of the doubt. I would rather have to fight werewolves and vampires covered in my own blood than watch any Twilight. Enough – become a vampire or shut up. Quit leading on the undead and giving gross goth chicks hope that they’ll actually turn into immortal superbeings.
Harlold and Kumar part who gives a shit is next. “Did you see Doogie Howser? He’s great!” YES. IN EVERY ROLE HE DOES. He’s the gay guy who acts like a womanizing dick. WE GET IT. The other ones I haven’t even heard about. Why don’t they make good, wholesome flicks like Lionheart or First Blood anymore? Hollywood sucks.