I emceed the latest “Open Mike Talent Search” last night. As always, craziness ensued. One new comic took the stage and said, “I made a mistake and friended my Mom on Facebook.” Then he forgot his next joke and ran off the stage. I felt bad, for once. I got on stage and said, “Everybody, this is hard. That’s why I huff gasoline before every show. Then I don’t care.”
Another older guy was up next and I told him. “OK. It’s all good.” I turned around and he yelled, “NEXT!” I instantly made it my goal to destroy him for disrespecting the comic onstage. He took the stage and ripped me for not saying he was from Mississippi. He never told me…so obviously, it’s my fault. I then watched as he sat on the stool. The mike still rested in the stand, five feet away. I had, after six minutes, remove him from the stage. No one heard him. I grabbed the mike and said, “That guy was great. My favorite joke of his was…then I dropped the mike and mouthed nothingness to the crowd. Big laughs. “Also, for the comics left, there’s a mike you can use!”
After, his nephew walked past me and made a snide remark about disrespecting him. I turned and said, “Excuse me?” “Nothing.” That’s what I thought. I was fully ready for a fist fight after. At the clap off, he fell down and it was awful. I rolled my eyes to full view of the crowd. More laughs. I hate that guy. FYI, only $5 for the show. I think they got their money’s worth if for the simple fact that craziness was on display. I am definitely going next week for round 2.