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  • HGTV

    Posted by on August 23, 2017

    HGTV is a staple of most homeowner’s TV choices.  Not a fan, usually.  Modernize the kitchen?  Blah.  Landscaping?  Who cares.  Here’s some things that HGTV could put out that would grab my attention.

    How to install a trap door for door to door salesmen and people with petitions.

    How to put a pirate ship mast with a crow’s nest for using your spyglass to find the ice cream truck man from far away on top of your place.

    Building a Batcave by using your natural surroundings to mask the entrance.

    Brewing beer in five easy steps – and where to find the materials.  Lowe’s and Home Depot aren’t much help for this.

    Putting a pizza oven in your kitchen.  Shove your granite countertops; I want oven fresh pizza and I want it now.

    Constructing siege engines and gun turrets.  Your birdhouse is lame; I want catapults and trebuchets in case it goes down.

    Heated floors are nice, but what about cooling furniture/beds?  Come on HGTV, help me out here.

    That should do it for now, but I have to switch over the nature channels for how to raise bald eagles, so keep in mind how to build eagle’s eyries, HGTV.  I’ll be back.

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