I have a show tomorrow at Rehab Tavern at 8 pm (456 W. Town St., Columbus, OH). Here’s why you should attend in you are in Central Ohio.
1) It’s after the OSU game and you’ll probably be coming down off a buzz. What else are you going to do, mow your grass at 8 pm? If you’re mowing my neighbor’s grass, that’s actually cool. It’s a jungle over there.
2) It’s free and they serve alcohol. Both good reasons. Less popular answer? They have soft drinks! You just lost Family Feud. Dumb answer.
3) I’m doing new jokes. This is big news. Try writing new material with a 13 month old. Material everywhere, too tired to actually type or write words. I’VE EARNED IT.
4) I’ll fight a lion at the end of the show. Oh, the permit was denied. Well I tried.
5) NO ONE WILL KNEEL OR SIT FOR OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM. OK, that’s true, but there’s no national anthem before a comedy show. We may sit through Mother by Danzig though. Some drunk girl played it four times one night. (It was me, but I blamed it on her. That song is awesome.)
Did I mention it was a free comedy show?