I watched a lot of football this weekend, so I learned a lot from beer commercials. Like for example, if you drink a light beer, you are a young party animal. If it’s not light, you are a blue collar hard working man, probably enjoying a beer on your ranch.
Bud Light – If you drink this, you party ALL THE TIME. You go to concerts four nights a week, no matter where you live. This is even more amazing since you play softball, are in a pool league, and hang out with work buddies. It’s a fact, if you crack a Bud Light, 14 people will walk into your house and start fist pumping or your money back.
Michelob Ultra – If you imbibe a Mic Ultra you are a workout beast. You like to run shirtless (or in a sports bra) in a city on your lunch break with someone of the opposite sex. After your six mile run, you pound an Ultra then go back to work? Hopefully you work with the Bud Light people, they called off and won’t care.
Coors Original – You hang out in a bar that was handcrafted by a lumberjack on the side of a mountain. You drink fresh mountain water when you’re not drinking beer and your best friends are a grizzly bear and a bald eagle.
Miller Lite – You tell everyone at the bar how your beer was the first light beer, it’s less filling and it tastes great. Then you realize no one is sitting next to you because you’ve been repeating yourself for 30 f’n years.
Budweiser – Oh wait, this a Chevy commercial. It’s exactly the same, but with no beer. Cowboys, horses and freedom. America.