I only blogged a couple times last week, thanks to my first real vacation in about six years. Usually, I only use vacation days for important things like paid comedy gigs or hangovers, but I actually have built up some time at work…and my schedule is rather light. I’m sure it’s not my act, I’m very talented and good looking. Must be something else!
I went with my fiance’s family. I could almost hear in my head before the trip, “Oh, you’re getting another beer?” Luckily, it was actually pretty relaxing, but I had never taken an extended trip with children since I was one. Day one, 8 am, two boys decided I was a lazy sack and woke me up. I was so stunned by their absolute bravery, I was almost impressed. Almost. They must have been horrified at what I looked like at that ungodly hour, because they let me sleep in the rest of the week.
I got to take my dog also. I realized the fun of letting him swim in Lake Michigan was immediately surpassed by the realization that you have a 90 lb. dog covered in dirty lake water and sand. Well, there goes that moment. Looks like I’ll have to throw him in my neighbor’s pool in the future. I’m sure they won’t mind, they never say anything when he shits in their yard. Of course, when they make eye contact with me, I drag my thumb across my neck and grimace. It’s easier than picking up dog turds with a Giant Eagle bag.