There is a lot about comedy that is annoying for all the fun – trust me, it’s fun. I get to drink and hold a microphone. You may not like me, but as long as most people do, I get hired to come on back and piss you off again. Plus I get the delusional acceptance that comes with laughter, even if (and it often is) at my expense. The bad part is the business aspect.
Most of the work comes from bookers at my level, which means some are really cool and some are not. They scour the land, setting up comedy shows and giving comics like me repeat work. If you piss one off, you’re fired. If you’re late or miss a gig, you’re fired. If you get a bad report card, drink too much, bitch about the hotel, etc. – you’re fired. If you kiss some ass, you get rewarded with the agent putting your resume, not bio up at the gig. This actually happened to me, which meant for a week, every patron got my home address, phone number, and email address from my resume that was posted in the entrance. Thanks! It would’ve been really hard to request a copy of my bio, which I have saved on the computer I used to email you five times last month. Need my PIN number, perhaps my Social Security card while I’m unknowingly offering up personal info?
I have four shows this month where the booker hasn’t told me a start time, three of which I don’t even know what fucking city they’re in (thus, not on my schedule you see to your right). It’s OK, I’m sure I’ll get an email two days beforehand, which is really convenient, since I work over 40 hours a week and most jobs just let you schedule vacation on seven minutes’ notice. “Well, Chris, we’d like you to start next week.” Great! What day? “Hmm, I’ll get back to you. Don’t be late, though, or your ass is gone! Welcome to the team!”