Comedy in bars

I have done more shows in bars than probably anywhere else.  Usually they go well…but sometimes bar owners think comedy works organically, despite the facts.  I did a show once and the manager refused to turn off the TV’s.  It was the opening round, day one of the NCAA tournament.  I did not, amazingly, have a good set.

Other times, the crowd just sucks ass.  My show last Friday was packed.  At first, I was somewhat excited, then realized once the emcee fired up the show the music was still going and some long-hair in the back was trying to impress a chick by heckling.  It wasn’t even good heckling, which I have actually seen once or twice.  Rather, it was “BE FUNNY!”  He said this after the host said, “How’s everyone doing tonight?”  Yes, good one douche.  ENTERTAIN ME INSTANTLY!  I HAVE ADD AND WASN’T BREAST FED!  I NEED ATTENTION!  I debated getting in his face, but he left almost as soon as the show got going.  Probably good for all involved.

Later in the show, I watched a gentleman argue with the bartender over the size of his shot/drink.  This turned into 30 seconds of arguing…during a comic’s set, which caused a drunk chick to yell back at the cheap asshole, “Manners!”  He then threatened her, causing quite a ruckus.  Ah, nothing says joke time like a woman getting potentially punched by a drunk guy.  Maybe I can perform a show in the Octagon next time there’s a UFC pay-per-view.