Posted on by Chris

Top five things I could never hear again and be happy

1. “You working hard or ya hardly working?”  Hardly working b/c I’m talking to an uninteresting zero.  2.  “This weather is the worst I’ve seen in a while.”  Really?  It’s winter.  Amazingly, it tends to repeat itself.  It always sucks.  3.  “Where is this relationship going?”  Nowhere if you keep this up…  4.  “Have you seen this (TV show, movie, etc.)?”  No.  “Well let me tell you all about it…”  That’s great, I don’t have any reference point.  If it is interesting, you just ruined it.  If it sucks, I am now going to put this gun in my mouth and play can I hold out until you’re done.  5.  “You’re the get cialis online father of my baby.”  Blah, blah, blah…

2 Replies to “Top five things I could never hear again and be happy”

  1. 5. T.G.I.F. or thank god it’s friday. First, this assumes that people don’t work on saturdays. Not everyone has a sweet office job they got by having a C- average in college you assholes. Second, why not try to be happy and
    thankfull for every day? The kind of people who say T.G.I.F. are so miserable every other day of the week I would rather saw open my scrotum with a rusty blade than spend an 8 hour workday with them. Get over yourself and your shity attitude, nobody cares.
    4. OMG! (or Oh My God!) I hate this whole tweenager MTV hip lingo. You’re an idiot, own up to the fact and do
    something about it. Like learning English. It’s even worse when said by anyone over the age of 25. Just trust me, it’s not cool. This is why we should let kids play with plastic
    bags. Anyone who is stupid enough to use the phrase OMG is stupid enough to smother themselves with a piece of plastic. Problem solved.
    3. Fo’ Shizzle. Does anyone still use this? If they do I would gladly embrace their demise. It wasn’t even that cool when Snoop Dog said it and it sure the fuck isn’t when you say it. Plus you’re white.
    2. LOL. Can you people hear yourselves? Do you ever think about what you’re saying when you hit send. What’s worse, people actually SAY this now. “Jenny is so funny, LOL.” If she was funny I would say “I know” and then laugh. If she wasn’t I would punt you and her in the crotch. Or just walk away. Whatever.
    1. LMFAO. ??? What the fuck are you people talking about? Use your words like grown-ups. Phrases like this are why people become alcoholics.

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