• Trivia = fighting

    Posted by on November 19, 2010

    I did a trivia w/ a group cialis how long to take effect tonight.  I have done this several times.  Three worst things – 1) The person who contributes nothing before the team submits a wrong answer, but is an expert after the fact.  “You know, I knew it was that.”  Shut it zero.  2) The instant expert.  “Well Bob here watched a TV show once of machines, so he knows how many ice cream sandwiches can be made in an hour at full production.”  3) The skeptic.  Our question one time was when did the Battle of Wounded Knee occur?  I said, being a former president of the national history honorary in college, 1890.  “Are you sure?”  My answer: Well, the Sun Dance movement was the final native religious movement in American history.  It caused the military to suspect an uprising among the reservations.  Also, it was the last major “conflict” between America and Indians as they turned a gatling gun on unarmed Indians.  “Are you sure?”  YES I’M SURE, YOU DUNCE!  Beyond that, trivia is awesome.  Enjoy.

  • Your daily dose of stupidity

    Posted by on November 16, 2010

    The latest TSA best prices on cialis “groin check” controversy is annoying; especially b/c pilots are getting patted down also.  Why would a pilot bring a bomb onto a plane?  “My wife left me, I lost my house…I want to kill everyone on this flight.  How can I do this?  If only I had a bomb – damn TSA!”  This is on the same level as the “No firearms in this business” signs that would keep exactly no one from gunning down everyone.

  • Veterans Day

    Posted by on November 12, 2010

    This day was chosen b/c of the armistice for WWI, one of the most underrated horrible wars of all time, where the tactics didn’t match the technology.  Our doughboys went over the top in fruitless charges into machine gun fire, then retreated into trenches with rot, rats, poison gas, and the constant shelling that led to “shell shock”, the old timey phrase for PTSD.  We honor our vets this day – I saw an ad in my paper from a woman to her dad today.  She said that her father only saw her in a pic her Mom sent in WWII, then he was killed at the Rhine river at the end of the campaign against the dirty Nazis.  Yet, she was not bitter.  She said to her father, “We will see each other in heaven to make up for the lost time.”  Why do we fight other countries?  America is the great experiment.  Although by modern standards, we had slaves, women couldn’t vote, we oppressed Indians – the fact remains that the history of the world is oppression.  We didn’t do everything right or quickly, but we laid a foundation to do everything right.  Before America, no commoner could vote.  No man could purchase private property unless one the elite.  Slavery was worldwide and unfortunately, still is.  Governments dicatated religion.   Monarchs called the shots for our lives from cradle to grave.  Then came America.  Flawed?  Yes.  Yet it remains the beacon of individualism and liberty.  You don’t like our slavery past?  600,000 men fell to defeat it on our own soil.  Do you think we have oppressed countries?  In the USSR, Stalin killed 20 million (maybe more) of his own citizens to impose his dictatorial regime.  Look up Mao Zedong and Pol Pot while you’re at it.  A popular Latin sublingual cialis saying was “Man is a wolf to man.”  Despite this, we live in a country where dreams still live and thrive.  Now you can live and thrive based on your drive, not your choice of church or race or sexual orientation or sex or fill in the blank.  This is greatly due to our veterans.  They didn’t sit around and drink beer, tea, etc. and discuss ideas.  They fought, they died, they sacrificed for the greater good of liberty.  My own father was a forward observer for the 101st Airborne – the man that replaced him in Nam was killed w/n a week of my Dad leaving that pit.  “The only death a democracy can die is by its own hand.” – Thomas Jefferson.  No one will ever overturn this grand experiment except us.  “Freedom is never more than one generation from extinction.  We didn’t pass it on to our children in our bloodstream.  It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same.”  – Ronald Reagan.  God bless our vets and God bless America.  (PS – my act is actually funny, not dead serious like this)

  • Why I don’t watch much comedy anymore

    Posted by on November 9, 2010

    George Lopez has a show.  On TV.  People actually watch.  (Hispanic overkill accent)  “Hey everyone, I’m really hyper!   Lindsay Lohan joke!”  (Stop talking and bug eyed leering at the crowd as you look left and right for 10 uncomfortable seconds.)  “George cialis expensive Bush had a book come out!”  (Insert token Bush is stupid joke, then look left and right with wild bulging eyes and mug for the camera.)  Seriously, who watches this shit?  I would rather watch my dog host a show with the sound of a puppy getting its tail clipped in the background.

  • Whites only?

    Posted by on October 23, 2010

    I just did a show at the MLK Arts Center in Cbus.  When I walked in, I was behind an older black couple and we both noticed by the bathroom they had a “Whites Only” sign (for historical purposes, obviously).  She looked at the doorman and said, “Is that real?”  He explained that it was for reference to history.  Really?  Real?  At the MLK Arts Center?  She was satisfied, but then turned and looked at me with an obvious scowl.  Like where to buy cialis without prescription I walked in w/ a hood on and said, “No Africans in my bathroom at the MLK Arts Center!”  Very interesting.  I did very well at the show, by the way.  I give props to the fact I had my white bathroom.  SARCASM!  Good Lord.

  • The tour stats

    Posted by on October 13, 2010

    7 shows in 8 cheap cialis no prescription nights complete.  3 states, 7 different venues,  nearly 2000 miles.  One show had 4 people in crowd, one cancelled but they didn’t tell me until I drove 40 miles to get there (I performed anyway), one show went 5 minutes, one I did 51 minutes.  A blind guy puking woke me up one day, my alarm woke me up with less than 5 hours’ sleep 3 beautiful mornings.   I sold a whopping two shirts, three DVD’s (one for 2 Bud Selects), and got free beer and shots at 5 shows.  I did great at 5 shows, OK at one, and ate my own ass at the 4 person show.  I got screwed into paying for a room one night, I got hooked up with a free meal at two others.  I spent 25% of my pay in gas money and donated part of my sales to breast cancer to another show.  This is comedy and I love it.