Winter is coming and it sucks

Fall is my favorite season, mostly because all the other ones suck.  Spring?  Still freezing for half of it and muddy, tons of crap to do around the house.  Summer?  I sweat if I move and the only thing on TV is golf.  Fall?  Nice temperature, football starts, holidays approaching.  Then we have winter.

Winter’s good points?  Christmas, New Year’s, fun in the snow (once).  Sometimes new TV shows.

Winter’s bad points?  Shoveling snow at 4 am just to get to work, then shoveling again to get back in driveway when home.  45 minutes to drive anywhere because people all become stupefied by snowflakes.  Dark at five pm.  Post New Year’s is the most depressing 2 month stretch of the year.  Chapped lips.  Dry feet turn into what can only be described as hooves and cracked hands.  Black dirty snow and ice all over your car, which takes seven hours to warm up and defrost.  Floors constantly wet or dirty.  Dry air.  Snot and booger production off the charts.  Inability to exercise (OK, that one’s not as bad).  Football ends.  Wife puts sub-zero feet in middle of my back at night.  Kid can’t go outside to burn off kid energy without a two hour ordeal of winterizing.  White Walkers killing all the Wildlings.  Vikings attack the granaries you worked all summer to stock up.  Everyone is sick every three minutes.

At least there’s chili everywhere and you can put beer outside at parties without it getting warm.  Not worth your nose bleeding when you sneeze because the air is more dry than Cairo in July, but it’s something.

* Really quick side note – my fundraiser for Pets for Patriots is going until December 13.   Please help me raise to my goal by giving as little as $10 or if you can’t give, by sharing the link on social media.  The money goes to help veterans with PTSD give shelter pets a home (win/win) and other great things, like help veterinary care for the pets of our veterans that can’t afford it.

Link is here: https://www.crowdrise.com/pets-and-vets-comedy-benefit-show/fundraiser/petsforpatriots