I went to the Newport Funny Bone (Cincy) to see my buddy Anthony O’Connell emcee the late show Friday. It’s kind of weird as a comic to have the weekend off. It’s cool, but you’re pissed that you’re not getting paid. Yay, I’m free! Oh wait, I’m in my 30’s and nothing is going on…
I was standing near the bar, b/c the room wasn’t yet open. A group of three chicks and a dude walked over. The ringleader grabbed my drink, not even hand on side, but full on top grab, like a claw game at the arcade and moved it. They then muscled me into the corner, mostly due to fatness, not rudeness, but cornered nonetheless. I then watched as they paid for drinks w/ gift certificates and didn’t tip. The guy bitched about the two drink min, even though he got in free. Then he bitched that the show started at 10:30. I looked at my watch – it was 9:54. How dare the show not start the exact instant he walked in?
The animals decided, when Anthony got onstage, that they would continue their converstations unabated instead of, I don’t know, watching the fucking show. This really insuffurable mess in the front yelled three times until Ant told her that her time was over, it was his time. She then tried to talk to him as he was walking off, saying, “I helped you out!” No you didn’t. If you want to help, wear all black and go jogging on the freeway in an hour.
Even worse was this loud idiot to my left. She decided to repeat whatever was said on stage. Comic: “I don’t like bill collectors, man.” Idiot: “Oh shit! I don’t like bill collectors either!” Comic: “That guy was a super douche.” Idiot: “Oh shit! She said super douche!” After 45 minutes of this, I thanked God I haven’t got my conceal and carry yet. I really do hate most people and sadly, I wasn’t even performing…
Hey Chris,
Great post. I’m glad I am not the only person that feels the same way you do. I work with a bunch of average joes/janes that think they are “all of that” and guess what, I’m the damn janitor. I work with Ph.d’s and medical Doctors. They have to be some of the dumbest people I’ve ever worked around.
By nature of my personality, I am a introvert so I am very sensitive to my surroundings and therefore I watch, observe and listen more than I talk.
By just watching and listening to peole, most of the time they all make me sick. People are so vile and ignorant towards one another. It’s disheartening.
PEOPLE MAKE SICK! They really do. It has nothing to do with race, gender,etc…..I’m a black guy and I don’t know whom I dislike more–black folks or white folks. There isn’t a dimes bit of difference.
It’s a good thing I’ve been putting off getting my CCW, for similar reasons. :o)
I’m in Columbus, I’ll have to check out one of your shows. I see you’ll be in Gahanna. That’s not to far from me.
Continued success!