Tonight at the Funny Bone I was asked to MC a show w/ 8 brand new comics (of 13). I felt like when they handed me the lineup I was the undertaker from the Godfather. “I need you to use all your powers to put my son back together…I don’t want his mother to see him like this.” Show wasn’t awful b/c the newbs brought a healthy crowd, though. Memorable moments: A newb did a Robin Leach where can i get cialis impression. Yes. In 2010. I said, “The next comic will do an impression of a comedian!” I’m an ass. The worst one? Bombed for the entire show. I said “That’s why you only paid $5. I looked at this guy and thought, “Don’t do drugs.” Then I looked again and said, “Don’t let pregnant women do drugs.” I’m a dick, but you know what? I love America. Talk shit now.